Question:
I always enjoy your columns, but was especially moved by the letter about the dog placing a toy on the couch where a deceased dog used to lay. It reminded me, once again, of something that happened back in 1980. At that time, my late husband was in the final stages of a long illness. Not wanting to make any more visits to the hospital, he chose to stay at home to await the end. Our miniature poodle, Mitzi, loved us both, but had an especially close bond with my husband. During the final weeks, I would zip home at lunch hour to see if my husband needed anything, and I would always find Mitzi parked right beside his chair like a good little nurse. One day, while he could still communicate, he told me that he didn't want Mitzi to die of grief when he was gone. To prevent this he made me promise that, when the time did come, before calling to report his death I would put Mitzi up beside him and let her check out the situation for herself. I knew my husband was a very wise man, but I didn't see how that could hel
J.M.S., of Punta Gordo, FL Feb 22, 2004
Answer:
I have an 8-year-old Scottish fold cat that my husband loved and gave lots of attention to. When my husband was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and wasn't given much time to live (he passed away on July 9, 2003), he stopped giving Boo attention. About one week before he died, we had a chair next to my husband's bed so we could sit and say our goodbyes. Boo jumped onto the chair (only once) and laid there for a few minutes, then jumped down. It seemed as if he was saying his goodbyes, also. A couple of days before my husband passed away, Boo was sitting on an end table at the head of the bed and howled the most horrible cry I've ever heard, like he was in extreme pain. I know that my husband's system was shutting down at that same moment, and I'm sure my cat sensed it. He has been depressed ever since my husband died. I recently bought a kitten to help Boo and me through our grieving. Occasionally Boo will play with him, so I'm hoping things will improve. --J.R., of Schenectady, N.Y. DEAR: DEAR DR. FOX: I
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